Have you heard of FutureMe.Org? It's a way of sending yourself (or loved ones) an email at a specified time in the future. Well, I stumbled on this a few years ago and scheduled a few emails that I promptly forgot about. So imagine my surprise to get this in my inbox a couple of days ago...
It made me laugh because in the 2+ years since I wrote this to myself (on a particularly difficult day of readjustment to becoming a new 'family of 4') my feelings haven't changed a single bit.
People are often quite shocked that I am SO certain about our family being done and that I most definitely don't want any more children. We are both completely besotted with our kids, have plenty of space at home, our financial situation would cope with another child without too much worry. Several people have said they just don't get it. But no, broodiness isn't something I have ever really felt and that certainly hasn't changed with motherhood.
Then, after the initial amusement, I remembered how completely wretched I felt when I wrote that email. How worried I was that having a second child would damage my lovely boy and our relationship for ever. Until then he'd been my little buddy, my constant companion and the centre of my world, and suddenly there was a beautiful vulnerable little baby girl who also needed my attention a lot of the time. I couldn't see past that time and imagine that they'd be playmates and love and tease each other in equal measure. That I'd look at them together a few years on and want to cry with happiness at the way they are as thick as thieves.
So if I could pop back in time to visit the version of me who was sat on the edge of her bed in tears after a very difficult day juggling that baby and needy jealous toddler, I'd say
'Chill out Sair. Relax. Breathe. This too will pass and it'll all work out just fine.'
And I'd give myself a great big cwtch (hug).
I got this from one of the lovely blogs I follow a few weeks ago and have saved it to my phone in case of any such moments in the future. I might schedule it as another email for when they hit the teenage years :)
If you like it, you can download a printable version here.
It's been wet and dreary today but we've actually had a lovely time regardless. We all pottered about the house this morning (I even got an uninterrupted BATH!!!!) and then D cooked a delicious roast beef lunch before all 4 of us squeezed onto a single sofa to watch Shrek Ever After under a big blanket. I can't tell you if the film was good, because we all fell asleep, which we obviously all needed.
I also did a little bit of fiddling with the crochet circle I'd intended as a cushion cover (love the granny squares so much more, I couldn't do it!) and turned it into a rather unusual bird using this Attic 24 tutorial for inspiration.
I wanted to alter the beak - it really doesn't look right to me - but My Boy confiscated it, cuddled it and declared the beak to be perfect, so I guess it'll stay as it is *shrug*. D is calling it a "Mutant Chicken", but I think it's probably the Cwtch-Cwtch Bird.
Knitting is not going so well - but that's another story for another day - maybe by Wednesday I'll be at peace with it enough to share.
Hope you have had a great day where you are
(if not, just remember to breathe - it'll all be fine)
(if not, just remember to breathe - it'll all be fine)
and I'll be back tomorrow for Book Sharing Monday.
xxxxxxx
It's funny, loads of people have been asking me recently whether I am having anymore - seems once you get past 2 children they expect you to have a football team!
ReplyDeleteI love your mutant chicken and I hope the knitting sorts itself out
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I've got 3 and can't have any more. I always imagined I'd have another a few years down the line but other stuff took over and I had to choose between my health and possible future baby and I had to go for the more sensible option of my health, after all I'm no use to my children otherwise. I'm ok-ish about it now, my youngest is 2.5 and growing up so fast so I will enjoy him while he is small. I did love the newborn stage though!
ReplyDeleteLove the bird and the Cwtch-Cwtch Bird is a very fitting name.
The future me e-mail is fantastic but oh my 2 years ago I was at my broodiest and desperate to have a number 3. How things have changed. I love 2 and really dont want to add to the mix for now. I remember too those worries about how having a new sibling would affect Josie especially after 4 years of just the 3 of us. Like your two mine are as thick as thieves and they make my heart melt watching them enjoy each others company.
ReplyDeleteLoving the bird. Josie is very critical of the peak on hers so I will have to tweak the pattern for the next one xx
so glad you left the link to this post on my blog. Loved it! Maybe I should write my future self an apology note for wanting 5+ kids. :)
ReplyDeleteThere's at least one thing in that 'How to really love motherhood' note that mum does VERY well Sair!!! Haha.
ReplyDeleteZippadeedoodaa...
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